Missionary – Page 10 – Letters from Home

A One-question Survey

My friend’s son is serving a mission in Tennessee, and with Covid restrictions, he does a lot of phone calls and video calls. It is working! The missionaries are able to contact more people in a day via phone than the traditional method of knocking on doors. Therefore, they are reaching and inviting more people to learn of Christ.

When someone answers the phone, the missionary introduces himself and asks, “Would you be willing to answer a one-question survey?” If the answer is no, the missionary says, “Thank you for your time, may we leave you with a short message?” If allowed, he shares a brief scripture and testimony of Christ.

If the person has time for a one-question survey, the missionary asks,

“If you could have one question answered by God, what would you ask?”

This really good question has opened up many conversations, connections, and Christ-focused change.

I have been thinking about this question, and still can’t come up with what I would say. I have so many questions, and I look for answers every day. Today my questions circle around a theme, “What needs to be done so people stop hating one another?”

As I write this, I realize the question I should be asking is, “How can I show greater mercy and kindness to the people I interact with today?” (See, our Father in Heaven is answering our questions all the time, within our thoughts and ideas and study.)

Also, I think this week I will re-read the Sermon on the Mount.

Emotional tool kit

I have done some work in the family’s bedrooms this week, and this video speaks to the feelings I have as I watch my children’s rooms change as they grow and leave home.

Seven months ago, before the pandemic impacted our lives, I had an idea to create an emotional tool kit, with physical objects to inspire and comfort. I wrote down a list on a post-it note, and began to move the note in my day planner, putting it off for another time. Maybe I was in denial. “Oh, I won’t need this,” or, “If I make it, something will happen that will make me need this.”

Then came new levels of isolation, earthquakes, uncertainty about the evacuation of missionaries, challenges from distance learning in schools, canceled plans, discomfort and disfigurement from abdominal surgery, and the secluded hospital stay. And so on.

I have been comforted, even without my little tool kit, no doubt about that. Still, this week, I remembered that I hadn’t compiled it, and decided it was time. It wasn’t difficult. I gathered things into an old hat box and slid it beneath my bed. Who knows if I will ever use it as I envision I might. If nothing else, it is a time capsule, and a reminder of my faith that comfort can be found in Christ, always.

The objects are small and have personal meaning. Some things are soft; others spur memories; on the bottom of the box are the scripture notes I have taken this year, which follow my 2020 spiritual journey even better than my journal. I tucked in a Michael Buble album that I love.

At times, everyone needs reminders that things are going to be okay.

If you are doing well, share your energy with others. If you are doing poorly, consider handling some physical reminders that Heavenly Father loves you and sent His Son for you. Allow the Spirit to bring joyful things to your remembrance. (John 14:26)

Home

These weeks have not been easy. The not knowing, the not-so-good news, the waiting, painful conversations with people who heard Daniel was home when he was not, the constant school emails, and the work stress were rough. Things were complicated in Chile. Daniel helped print four different release certificates for himself in the mission office as his evacuation date moved several times. I prayed for peace constantly. One night, out of words to pray, I lay in bed praying the words to “Bring Him Home,” which was one of my more effective prayers.

Neither Richard nor I slept well the night before Daniel’s flight, and Richard tracked that plane constantly throughout the day. I kept busy, but felt my chest tighten as the day progressed. We drove to the airport together, two nervous wrecks. No, we didn’t think he would come home sick or harmed, but we were embarking into an unknown. Daniel arrived, full of light and reassurance. That night, I had my best sleep in years.

It’s not that we lacked faith. It’s that faith sometimes needs to be tested. Would we complain? Would we push our needs ahead of others who were suffering in different ways? Would we keep turning to God? Would we be overly dramatic about circumstances? Would we neglect the needs of our other children as we hyper-focused on our worries about international travel for Daniel? Would we stop acknowledging the blessings that flowed because Daniel was serving a mission? Would we forget hope? Would we neglect the little things like family prayer and scripture study in this sickly, dense fog?

There is much more to live before the resolution of this story. I don’t want to forget the comfort that only came through prayer. I don’t want to forget the light in Daniel’s missionary face. I don’t want to forget that there was a continual flow of understanding and concrete instructions as I read the Book of Mormon each day, pen in hand. These have been precious, soul-expanding days leading up to his return. Now that he is home, I am giving myself permission to breathe, rejoice, rest, and just look at Daniel’s face, in line with the rest of our children, all gathered together again.

My letter this week

Dear Daniel,

Did you ever look through a kaleidoscope? That’s what life feels like right now. We get used to looking at a beautiful pattern through the lens, but it’s only temporary; the world rotates, and little pieces of our lives shuffle to different places. For a time, there is a grating noise, and some resistance to rotating the scope. It feels chaotic and uncomfortable, but another pattern emerges from the shuffling of pieces. Beauty and order always find a way. There are beautiful patterns emerging from this time of upheaval. We don’t know how our little pieces will rearrange themselves, but they will, all under the direction of a loving Heavenly Father.
We love you and we are proud of you. I choose to celebrate who you are, and not focus on the “change of plans” so much. Coming home a little early will not change the impact you have had on people in Chile. It will not change who you are, and who you have become. Your love for the gospel is needed here, and the Lord will use you, wherever you are. I feel gratitude to the members in Chile for their loving care of you. My heart goes out to your president and his family. I pray for everyone.
I am filled with hope and peace, and it will all work out. A silver lining for me is that I will have you around again to talk to. We’ll enjoy the next pattern in the kaleidoscope soon.
Love,
Mom

Sure things

There is nothing unique about my experience during this past week of cancellations due to COVID-19. I have watched my email folder fill up with messages from schools and church and made necessary adaptations. The boys are home, except when they go out to work or walk. My life stays largely the same, including my level of fear. During most of my adult life, I have regularly expected to catch each illness, die of sepsis from an abscessed tooth, or choke to death all alone… if a car accident didn’t take me first. I have similar fears for each family member. In other words, welcome to my world, world. The real weight of this time for me rests in the reality that Daniel is thousands of miles away, on another continent.

A few sure things to which I cling:

Our Father in Heaven knows where we are and exactly what we need.

Our Savior Jesus Christ knows the depth and breadth of our feeling.

The Father’s plan is never frustrated.

Angels minister to us.

The Holy Ghost never misspeaks or offends. He brings comfort, power, and direction. What an amazing friend and companion.

The Book of Mormon is dear and true. It has helped me through every challenge, my whole life, and it continues to help me now.

No one is unique in their struggles, and my struggles are not more valid than yours. But Sure Beings and the true things carry every one of us through, whether we have eyes to see or not. This I know.

Some Things I Love

I finished assembling the quilt top, thanks to the gift of an extra day.

Tim broke the family speed record for skiing. I wish I didn’t know this.

After 11 years of searching, then waiting for a sale, I bought a piano lamp.

Richard and I spent about 5 hours preparing French food yesterday, and it was really disappointing how awful it tasted. Ours actually looked like this photo. pc: tablespoon.com

This week, as I ran errands and shopped, I was asked a few times if I was planning to do something fun. Yes! We celebrated Richard’s birthday with food, food, presents, food, and desserts. At Costco, someone asked if the next big birthday was the big 4-0, and since the scales have tipped toward 50 for me, this miscalculation has embedded itself in my heart and grown into many private smiles. I love celebrations with family, the preparation, anticipation, and the memories.

And, if you want to see Paige’s 8 beautiful paintings inspired by The Secret Garden, her show is coming up soon. I love seeing Paige’s illustrations.

As for the Daniel, he had the opportunity to meet Elder Uchtdorf and shake his hand last week, and he was invited to share his testimony in Stake conference. He is moving to a new apartment that has hot water. He has been busy assembling emergency kits for each companionship in the mission. With summer holidays coming to an end, they expect more protests and violence in his area, but the kits are more in preparation for earthquakes. He is teaching Rosa and others with his companion who is from Canada. I had my first bad dream about his safety, and I can’t hear The Prayer (Bring Him Home from Les Miserables) or Danny Boy without tears. Still, I love being part of a missionary family.

One thing I do for my calling at church is teach Primary children during ward conferences. I made this visual aid for last Sunday to teach about Isaiah’s “Mountain of the Lord’s House” and it was a lot of work, but the kids really loved the doors and windows. They also loved talking about how temples are like mountains, places to feel peace, quiet, and see beauty and light. I also loved the comment about mountains being places of adventure. I think learning of God’s ways is one of the great adventures of life. I love what I learn as I serve in Primary.

Thoughts on a Snow Day

The snow day, and its limitations and opportunities, has brought out different things in each of us. I pull into my familiar routines of comfort, warmth, and words. Richard makes gallant efforts every few hours to push the next 8-12″ off the driveway since the last pass. Tim has been gone since 5:45, earning money shoveling snow. Mark, feeling caged and frustrated, made toffee, then a gourmet lunch, and settled in for an afternoon of television. Whenever he surfaces, it is to complain how snow days seem like they will be great until they happen. Tim is driving our best snow vehicle, but we have no plans to go anywhere in this weather. I just watched the mail carrier’s truck fishtail out of the circle, despite chains on his wheels. No mail today. When storms like this come, it is often 24 hours before the plows can reach our home. 18″ of snow fell today. I will feel better when Tim makes it safely back to the driveway. I will make warm, starchy comfort food and keep alternating between two delicious books.

We had a video call with Daniel today, in a new area with a friend assigned as his new companion. Challenges include crime, no hot water, very high temperatures and no wind, and an empty area book. He smiles and smiles while telling me this, and I know he’s having the best time.

This is God’s Work, not Ours

There have been baptisms that took place on Daniel’s mission that he never told us about, and sometimes we piece together that he is a leader or training someone. He sent home a memory card of photos and we learned all kinds of things. He is not trying to be a tourist missionary, always remarking on the novelty of the people. I am glad of that. Some photos, such as this one, really grab my attention. He shared this photo with me to send to friends this week, and I have had more responses to this image than any other message he has shared.

He wrote,

“In these last few weeks it’s been made very clear that this is God’s work, not ours, and that there are people prepared to receive the gospel.

‘For there are many yet on the earth among all sects, parties, and denominations … who are only kept from the truth because they know not where to find it. Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed’ (D&C 123:12,17).

‘For behold, I am God; and I am a God of miracles; and I will show unto the world that I am the same yesterday, today, and forever; and I work not among the children of men save it be according to their faith.'” (2 Nephi 27:23)

Elder Ross

Testimony

I didn’t realize this is how grown up our family looks. I’ve had lots of moments to reflect on life and our Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness in the past few weeks. This picture (even the absence of our adored missionary) represents all that the Savior has given us: absolutely everything that brings us joy. Here are just a few things this photo represents to me, made possible by our Savior:

repentance and forgiveness

the Gospel of Jesus Christ

covenants and ordinances

marriage

sacrifice

missionary work

miracles of healing and understanding

children

hope

testimony

faith in Christ

obedience to commandments

the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

patience

love

Biggest Week So Far

Paige and Michael were married on December 27 in the Salt Lake Temple. Photo by Rachel Angela Photography

Richard and I came away from Paige’s wedding day without a single picture, which tells you what a great time we had. We will post more another day. These are snapshots from family and friends who have taken the time to share with us. Thank you!

Leading up to the wedding, we had a big week, including Timothy’s 17th birthday and Christmas, and a hundred other interactions and lots of music. We saw Star Wars and decorated candy houses, turned in two Eagle Scout applications, and finalized special gifts. I am very happy.