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Gratitude in May

I am able to keep windows open all day lately, and the sounds of the breeze swirling our great cottonwood trees and the fresh air somehow dispel the busy feelings and replace them with grateful feelings. Consistently, I feel grateful for trees and green and warmer air.

May 7-13

  • grilled hamburgers and a lovely salad
  • clean sheets and bathrooms
  • Elder Kearon’s devotional
  • time to read on Tuesday
  • my neighbor was able to come over and hear her daughter perform a violin piece
  • Taste of Home chicken pot pie
  • passport work finished
  • the quilting ladies
  • the trees we had to cut down: Thank you for the beauty.
  • productive days
  • a quilt for Morgan
  • our bishop’s miraculous recovery
  • piano duets played by our sons
  • Mother’s Day magnets from Daniel

May 14-20

  • Paige’s Mother’s Day card
  • open windows and fresh air
  • Charlene Kettle
  • Excedrin
  • Sunday evening walk with Richard
  • 2 days outdoors at a tournament
  • NYC tickets ready
  • Mediterranean salad at Wendy’s
  • Mark is twelve.
  • Sunday night gathering of my boys on the bed to talk to me
  • Mark singing in the choir
  • Mark playing Uptown Funk and Indiana Jones on the trumpet
  • Tim’s jazz band recordings from Richard
  • passport arrived
  • dinner from my counselors when I was sick

Old, Last, and New

Losing trees is one of the saddest things. The previous owners’ daughters called this grove and the stepping stone path through the periwinkle “the beautiful.” I will miss the flicker of light filtering through the leaves. It hurt my heart to see two trees go, but aspens don’t live forever. The trees really called to me when we looked at this house the first time, and I feel some nostalgia for the days when there were tall aspens lining the path.

Speaking of moving to Utah, that was almost six years ago. Leaving Tucson meant leaving the incredible piano ensemble experiences our kids had every spring, where they played duets on a stage with twelve grand pianos. There is nothing on this scale here, but there are “monster concerts” the kids play in the mall with five pianos. It was nice to hear the boys perform duets together one last time before Daniel leaves.

We came home from the monster concert to discover that the corsage Daniel ordered for prom was the wrong color and the flowers were wilting, so I made my first wrist corsage on Saturday. I felt more stress about this corsage than I thought was possible over some flowers and glue. Daniel went to prom with McKenna and I just hoped the flowers would stay on that wrist corsage all evening. I probably should have hoped he would have fun, but that was a given since he was with McKenna and happy friends.

Last Week

Last week was a wrestle. I wrestled with church dilemmas, the clock, illnesses, and expectations. But there was a three-tiered cake one night, and clean surfaces everywhere, evidence that when I am doing mental work, physical work goes right along with it.

Last week,  there was so much calling me to stay home with the family. They needed my skills, my advice, my health, my early mornings, late nights, afternoon errands, and my touch.

Last week’s lessons:

  • Don’t bury concerns. Express them.
  • BYU application essay editing is a good way to spend a LOT of time with your senior. BYU requires six, people. Six!
  • You can’t wash your hands too often during flu season.
  • The boost in morale will come.
  • It’s ok to choose the less time-consuming option.
  • Conversations happen away from screens.
  • I experienced a miracle.
  • Everyone’s faith is a little different, even within the same church, and that is ok.
  • God knows ahead of time when I will fail to act, whether from laziness or pulls from different directions. He prepared a contingency plan or two last week so people were still cared for.
  • Life is long. I don’t have to do it all at once.
  • To write is to be vulnerable.
  • The sacrament is so precious to me.

Autumn comfort

As I drove around town today, Alan Jackson’s song about 9/11 came on the radio. It was good to have a few minutes to reflect on what that day meant for our country and the emotions we all went through at that time.

I spent a little while making things a little more cozy around the house. I love that we will be in slippers and blanket season soon.

Labor Day

The house is quiet. Daniel and I are the only ones home for the holiday. Last night, the two of us played violin-piano duets and sat quietly in the family room, reading. If you know me, you realize that this was good for my soul. Today, I took a minute to photograph a few things I see in the house. Paige’s empty room after moving out on Saturday. Tomato bounty. Lego figures placed at my bedside by two of my boys to make me smile. New rose bushes in bloom. The lavender rose is so heavy with petals, it droops under the weight. Its fragrance is just everything. The yellow roses smell like a garden from childhood.

Welcome September!

Thankful

A phrase from a scripture really captured my thoughts recently, “when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God…” (Alma 37:37)

I have been working to show more gratitude in my morning prayers, and not just dump my list of concerns and requests. I like what it does for the day to begin with more gratitude.

Here are some things I am thankful for today:

  • everyone home safely from camps
  • children who do not complain
  • roses blooming
  • the fragrant summer rainstorm last night
  • a favorite new music album
  • lemon bars
  • my white kitchen
  • a new sewing machine
  • my dad’s 50th anniversary of being baptized last week
  • opportunities to serve
  • beautiful views of mountains
  • summer evenings outside
  • good neighbors
  • trees that make a rushing sound in the wind
  • strength to run errands
  • the boys’ friends
  • Paige playing, “Girl with the Flaxen Hair”
  • Timothy playing, “If You could Hie to Kolob”
  • Mark playing all of his jaunty pieces
  • Daniel’s stellar piano arrangements
  • family is eating all the food I prepare
  • strength of the women in my neighborhood
  • things I am learning in personal study
  • things I am learning from interacting with many people
  • things I am learning from my mistakes
  • the Book of Mormon
  • Richard.

Vamp

photo by Liz

In the score of a musical, there are measures marked “vamp,” and you repeat these simple measures over and over as the actors do their lines before jumping into song. Some nights the actors take a little longer with their lines, and there will be more repetition. If you want an example of what I am talking about, listen to “Tradition” from Fiddler on the Roof on YouTube. As Tevye speaks, the orchestra vamps.

This week I am between numbers, just vamping: sleep, pray, eat, work, sleep, pray, eat work. Richard is at Scout camp, and I’m a little aimless, except for my goal to pick up all the pieces. I find myself free to clean out drawers and organize files. Clutter, beware. I can’t vamp forever, with a family reunion and a trip to Yellowstone coming up, but the simple beat of sorting through our home will make the transitions easier.

It’s just good to know where the socks are. It’s good to refill the empty sugar and flour containers, and discard old plastic cups that have taken over the kitchen drawer. Somehow in all the sorting, I find myself again. I get so lost when we are away from home.

A small solution

These coasters make me happy because they are pretty and they will help us not run out of water glasses by 10 am every day this summer. I searched many fine stores over the years for coasters I liked, but finally found these at Walmart this week. I placed a name on each coaster and now we are officially ready for summer. That is all for today.

Come walk with me

The annual bouquet in our front yard tree is in bloom, and as I sit in the living room with it right outside the window I think there couldn’t be anything more lovely. We celebrate our anniversary this weekend. What has the past year brought in our lives?

Places we have been together: Fish Creek, the Weber, San Diego, Sparks, St George, Moab

Recreation: Scuba diving (Richard), racquetball, walking, hiking, skiing

Projects: garden, 4-wheelers, wiring, humidifier, furnace, painting, quilts, dolls, books

Disagree about: piano lesson times, entertainment, the allure of rock shops

Agree about: most things

Difficulties: watching children go through trials; sometimes feeling disconnected because of full lives

Happy things: watching children overcome challenges; annual family Christmas video; trips with the family; watching our children sing, draw, paint, dance, excel in school, and show responsibility at work and church; dinner dates

Things we need to improve: temple attendance; time together

Things I admire about Richard: he is a faithful, regular blood donor; he enjoys being Scoutmaster; he always has a project; he kisses me goodbye every morning; he drives a terribly uncomfortable car with only a tape deck to work, over an hour a day, and doesn’t complain. He is married to a sometimes aloof, always sensitive, high-strung person and is still standing. I try to make up for my faults by occasionally baking brownies, lemon bars, and cookies.

The 2012 list in 2017

Page one of a list I made of things to fix in our house in 2012

I have never had a to do list last for 5 years. We work at this old house all the time, but it’s mainly things you can’t see, and by “we,” I mean Richard. My contribution is to decorate (put pictures up over all the nail holes)  and keep everything clean. Beginning today, I am going to focus on finishing the painting. I will paint with the minutes I have each day until it’s done. I have had it with shabby walls and ceilings.