Category: Family Time

Structuring home life with children

Over a year ago, someone asked me to write my advice for someone who was a new homeschooler. I haven’t talked about homeschool on this blog in many years, but I had an interesting moment this morning where I not only remembered this email, but felt a strong urge to post it here.

I think most of these points apply to anyone trying to structure home life with children, especially during the summer, so take what you need, and forget the rest.

1. Pray first thing as a family every day. Establish routines for start time, subjects, breaks, and lunch. Consider scripture time a daily subject.

2. Do things regularly with other families. It is good that kids play with children of all ages.

3. Choose a curriculum strong in language arts and math. Have a plan for the year, each month, week, and every day.

4. Steel yourself to criticism from those who don’t understand what you are accomplishing.

5. Go on dates with your husband without the kids.

6. Fill your house with books of all kinds and read, read, read together and independently.

7. Find a friend with whom you can share your experiences so school and children aren’t the only things you talk about with your husband.

8. Plan unstructured time for kids to explore their own interests. Their interests can propel their desire to read, write, and learn how to be proactive learners.

9. Celebrate achievements with certificates or stickers or whatever makes your kids happy. Don’t feel like you have to mirror a public school classroom with big charts, etc. You can do simple, meaningful things to track progress.

10. Go outside together or do crafts when things get too intense in the house.

11. Explore nature, go to museums, run and play, visit the elderly, take art classes, make collections together. Some of the best advice I received was to play with playdough with my children. Your children will need to help around the house, too. You can’t do everything yourself.

12. Look at every subject as a means to increase reading and writing skills.

13. Take pictures and cherish the time together. Don’t broadcast everything on social media. Honor your children’s privacy in learning and development.

14. Listen for and expect the Lord to lead you in small things and big things. Heavenly Father is even more interested in helping your children progress than you are, so be willing to accept answers that aren’t part of your original plan.

15. You can contact me if you want to talk. I was a homeschool mom for 14 years.

Art by Paige, around 2010

Sweet pork salads and burritos

Today I’m sharing our favorite recipes for sweet pork, cilantro lime rice, and cilantro lime ranch salad dressing. Think Cafe Rio. Yum.

Add some fresh tortillas, black beans, pico de gallo, cheese, lettuce, corn chips, and guacamole, and you are ready for a party. Our family loves this meal, and I estimate it serves 12 people.

I like to prepare the meat and dressing ahead of time, then it is an easy Sunday dinner or party menu.

Crock Pot Sweet Pork

  • 3 lb pork (boneless roast, country style ribs, etc.)
  • 1 chopped onion
  • 2 cloves garlic, minced (optional)
  • 3 T butter

Sauté onion and garlic in butter. Put roast in crock pot and cover with the sautéed onion and garlic. Cook 3 hours on high (or low equivalent). DRAIN. You can add the juice later to taste. Refrigerate the liquid and skim the fat if you want to add this liquid later.

If possible, shred the pork. If it is still tough, you can shred it before serving. Mix the following ingredients and pour over the pork in the crock pot:

  • 2 T. soy sauce
  • 3/4 c. lemon juice
  • 1 1/2 c. brown sugar
  • 1 t. salt
  • 1/2 t. pepper

Cook an additional 2 hours on high (or low equivalent) in the crock pot. Shred the pork and and serve with tortillas, rice, beans, etc. for salads or burritos.

Cilantro Lime Rice

  • 2 c. rice
  • 2 c. chicken broth
  • 2 c. water
  • 2 T butter
  • 1 clove garlic, minced (optional)
  • 1 handful of cilantro, finely chopped
  • 1/2 lime, juiced
  • 1, 4-oz. can diced green chiles

Pour everything into a rice cooker and follow product instructions. Or, to cook in a pot, heat liquids to a boil, add the rice and other ingredients, cover, reduce heat to low, and cook for 20-30 min., or until tender.

Remove the lid, fluff with a fork, add salt to taste, and serve.

Cilantro Lime Ranch Salad Dressing (Cafe Rio Style)

  • 3 T. salsa verde (green salsa with tomatillos)
  • 1/4 t. cayenne pepper
  • 1 small pkg (3 T.) ranch dressing mix
  • 1 c. mayonnaise
  • 1/2 c. sour cream
  • 1/3-1/2 c. milk
  • 1/2 bunch of cilantro, including stems
  • Juice of 1 lime

Mix together in a blender until smooth. 💃

Moab Trip

The Ross family tour bus departed on Memorial Day, just as most people packed up their RV’s to come home. We passed masses of traffic traveling home in the other direction, and discovered that the places we visited near Moab were not crowded. Richard made excellent plans and accommodations for us. He is so good at this.

After such a wet winter, the landscape was more green than we can remember. There were so many wildflowers, that whole fields were dusted in color, mostly orange, but many other colors, too.

Do you spy Paige and Michael, and Daniel and McKenna traveling with us? Lucky us! My brother Joe shared his van with us so we could all ride together.

The magic hour

The magic hour for conversations with Mark is between 10 and 11 pm. This has been true for most of our kids, and I read somewhere that teen circadian rhythms shift several hours beyond usual bedtimes. Late nights simply don’t feel late to them.

We try to be available for conversations late at night and early in the morning before school. This is also when we pray together.

I hope the rhythm of prayer will continue for our children long after they grow out of the funny rhythms of their teen years. I can think of no better comfort and help than prayer.

Current “family time”

I will never get tired of seeing all of these faces, even if it’s only possible through a video call because of distance.

Utah, Guam, Alabama…these are places we never guessed we would be. Our family is open to change, and this has enriched our life experiences. Sometimes, despite loving a place or a situation, we have left because we felt led to do it.

I have learned to not identify myself by where I live or even what I do. It can all change very quickly.

April 3 letter

Dear Friend,

Here is a letter to begin the month of April.

Our lives feel like they are on pause in this endless winter with so much snow that our canyon is closed.

We watched general conference all weekend. For us, this looks like Legos and blocks on the floor, blankets on the sofas and chairs, a whiteboard and markers for making summaries of talks, and so many snacks. Every crumb of snacks that I poured into bowls was consumed. I made cinnamon rolls and broccoli soup, and served a key lime pie and lots of other things. We walked each day to restore ourselves after the stupor of watching television.

I write this on a scheduled lazy morning. We are expecting another pile of snow today. (Happy spring break to us!) I can’t get excited about this week of snow and the removal of Mark’s wisdom teeth. In fact, I dread, dread, dread the wisdom teeth appointment. (Snuggling deeper into a blanket) Maybe if I think about Easter and make some plans that will help.

I am also watching another flight for Tim. He is always chatty and energized when he gets a transfer, which for the Micronesia Guam mission means an oversea flight. Richard watches YouTube videos analyzing plane crashes for enjoyment when I am not around. He knows that I don’t need to feed my mind any more death scenarios. I will be glad when the little green dot on the website lands in Guam later today, which is tomorrow for Tim.

I had several unconnected conversations with friends last month that led me to pick up my orthodontic retainers and wear them again. Never stop wearing your retainers is my piece of wisdom for today. There are lots of retainers in our lives, not just orthodontic ones: Date nights, repentance, the sacrament, finding God in prayer, finding Jesus in scripture study… Never stop with the retainers.

I have a quilt to finish, but I think I will wait to shop for more fabric. My stack of books is growing. Last week I was a little sick, and one night I went to bed discouraged by what I hadn’t accomplished. But then I felt the impression to consider all I HAD accomplished that day, despite all. Sometimes we just need to make a backwards TO DO list, and simply list what’s DONE. For me, this is the ultimate self care routine.

It is Holy Week. Happy Easter celebrations await.

Love,

A

Remembering

These were my grandmother’s books. On this anniversary of her death, I have been looking at photos I took of little corners throughout her home. I can still find her wisdom and her voice folded away like a sachet that sometimes gets jostled and leaves a subtle scent. She was so good at imparting family stories, gifting us with a sense of who we came from.

In 2018, I overheard her telling my mom about her father Axel’s passing. Assigned to the shift that night was a nurse who could speak his native language, Swedish. The nurse was not just able to speak words of comfort, but do it in the language of his parents and childhood. She spoke to him, quietly and tenderly, easing his fears during his final hours.

My parents and my aunt were with my grandmother on her last night. They told me that they read to her from the book of my dad’s childhood memories. I don’t know what she heard or understood, but I am glad that there were words of comfort and memory in the room for her, too.

No lentil soup?!!

We celebrated Richard’s birthday this weekend with all the good things. He is definitely worth celebrating. We had so much fun that I *think* he will forget that I neglected to buy a key ingredient for his birthday meal so it had to be postponed. Also, I sewed him a minky winter hat which turned out to be too small for his sweet head. Really, though, in memory, the wins should outlive the fails. I hope.

A very fun dinner in an Alpenglobe in Midway
Paige attended her new ward and discovered one of her youth leaders from Arizona is a ward member there. I call that a miracle