Category: Church

General Young Women Meeting Year 5

DSC_9555Paige and I got to go to the Conference Center tonight to see the General Young Women Meeting.

It was a powerful experience. Even the art in the halls and the smiling ushers were special to me. I was so grateful that Paige and I could have this opportunity. When all of those young women began to sing the opening hymn I couldn’t join them. I just tried to breathe and wipe the tears away as quickly as possible.

I watched the General YW President before and after the meeting, walking about and greeting people. This taught me a lot about her leadership style and her capacity to love. People can teach us even when they aren’t speaking to us. She was just a tiny speck from where we were sitting, but I could see how people reacted to her focused attention and how she maneuvered from shaking hands with apostles to hugging a little 12 year old girl. It is a skill to be able to greet so many people in a meaningful way.

I love General Conference season. When I am listening to the apostles and other leaders, gospel living seems well within reach. Their words inspire me to do better.

A Wonderful Story

family treeI’m at 9,300 words in my grandmother’s history. This week I have written about forbidden marriages, ocean voyages, WWII valor, sacrifice, family traditions, family recipes, and a lullaby. I’ve gazed at baby pictures of people I only knew after they had wrinkles. I have laughed, I have cried. I have seen how my great-grandfather looked in Paris and smiled at his beret. My source materials include letters written in the 1990’s to me, copious notes from Grandma’s stories, photographs that Paige took of photo albums and objects, my great-grandmother’s collection of newspaper clippings and photos, slides that I have painstakingly scanned over the years, and previous histories and careful genealogy work by my dad and aunt. I have had a Finnish letter translated. I have hoarded and identified every photo I can get my hands on. We have done some of my family’s temple work. Whenever I revisit family history, it fills my life.

My mom just finished her parents’ history and shared it with us on Sunday. It is a treasure and I came to love my grandparents even more through the reading of it.

The more I learn, the more I see that Norman Rockwell was painting OUR STORY! That little redhead on the top could be my Mark.

Klondike Derby

Klondike 3Images by Matthew Pettey

Daniel has some great Boy Scout leaders. I’m always happy to see photos of what Daniel does when he goes camping. These photos were taken in January at the Klondike Derby. The weather, which had been so bitter cold, decided to warm up to the 30’s for this camp, for which the mothers were very thankful. Evidently, Daniel wasn’t very cold. I don’t see him wearing a coat in any of these pictures.

Klondike 12I don’t have a good scout vocabulary for trying to comment on these photos, but I hear that Daniel did a good job lashing these poles together.

Klondike 9This was a day of competition among Scouts. Daniel’s patrol won first place overall.

Klondike 8They started a fire, which I think is one of the biggest draws to scouting.

Klondike 6No coat, no gloves. He’s a Scandinavian for sure.

Klondike 7Good leaders. Good boys. Good times. Daniel is so tall!

Gratitude

“I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me… for if they humble themselves before me and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” (Ether 12:27)

One of my weaknesses is that I deal with anxiety, especially in a crowd. I have been praying to know what I can do to become stronger. A few months ago, I was asked to play violin in church several times and I was invited to be in the Broadway review.

I almost backed out of playing the violin in church because of my fears. It’s hard enough to go to church and sit in the crowd, let alone play the violin for them. Then I realized that perhaps these invitations were an answer to my prayers. Maybe I needed to exercise myself a little bit more to regain my confidence. Maybe I needed to be known by a few more people so I didn’t feel so anxious at church.

“My dear young sisters, you need to know that you will experience your own adversity. None is exempt. You will suffer, be tempted, and make mistakes. You will learn [that] through overcoming challenges come growth and strength.

“It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself, that determines how your life’s story will develop.” (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, “Your Happily Ever After,” Ensign, May 2010, 124-27)

My experiences playing violin in sacrament meetings and the musical were not easy. These were acts of faith that required everything that I could give. Richard helped me because he was my accompanist. My friends were a help. Mark prayed for me every time I got up to play. I hoped that the music would heal someone.

Here is a picture of me that someone took backstage at the musical last night. After all of the rehearsals and the new friendships gained through my experiences there, I didn’t feel nearly as much fear as I do in church.

Fiddler

“God whispers in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but he shouts in our pains; it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” C.S. Lewis

“If thou art called to pass through tribulation…know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.” (D&C 122:5,7)

“He delivereth and he rescueth, and he worketh signs and wonders in heaven an in earth, who hath delivered Daniel from the power of the lions.” (Daniel 6:27)

Mark has not been healthy all month. A few days ago, he broke out in hives all over his body. We don’t know what caused it. It could be a reaction to an antibiotic or just an over-the-top immune response to a virus. He was miserable. It was scary. It was exhausting. We were blessed to find a good doctor. We feel blessed that he has responded to medication and he’s not covered in hives anymore.

“Though it may seem that you are alone, angels attend you. Though you may feel that no one can understand… our Savior, Jesus Christ understands… you are not alone.” (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, “Your Happily Ever After,” Ensign, May 2010, 124-27)

We received some thank you notes this week. For me, the written word is the best gift. This has been a difficult week. I received kind notes almost every day this week, and these lifted me. These people were a few of my angels as they took time to write something.

From one of Paige’s teachers:

Usually a note from a teacher is bad news…not so in this case. I just wanted to drop you a quick note to let you know how nice it is to have Paige in [class]. She is a conscientious student who is consistently at the top of the class. Her behavior in class is excellent, which is very much appreciated. Parents play an important role in their student’s success. Thanks for supporting her in her academic endeavors.

From Mark’s teacher:

Dear Angela, I am so sorry Mark is having this problem. (There was more, but it is personal.)

From the pharmacist, who went to war with the insurance company for me so we could get a medication:

I worked my magic. Have a nice weekend! After I picked up the medication, she said, “Now go treat yourself to something nice.”

From a new friend:

What an angel you are! Thank you for … It really meant a lot to me.
Love your friend,

From ward members:

…You have so much to offer…

and

…The arrangement was lovely and was played faultlessly. Thanks for sharing your talents…

From my sister:

Break a leg tonight! ( or maybe not since you will be on a roof…) I hope you are having a marvelous time!

There were many people who reached out in concern, built us up, prayed for us, and helped us through this big week. I believe there were unseen angels there to help, too.

I believe in angels, miracles, and that faith requires work. Through tough experiences, I learn that that we are loved by our Heavenly Father.

The Infinite Atonement

I read this book because I admire the author, Tad R. Callister and because my mom said that she enjoyed it.

Before I talk about The Infinite Atonement, I need to mention another book that I read by the same author called The Inevitable Apostasy and Promised Restoration. I LOVED IT. The strong organization and eloquent writing gave me a wonderful glimpse into a superior intellect and helped me to understand so much about apostasy in the early Christian church. The author draws upon the works of early Christian writers to show the origins of many modern Christian doctrines. It was a healing read for me.

I knew that the author had written another book, The Infinite Atonement, but I decided to wait to read it because I knew it would be doctrinally heavy and probably emotionally draining.

With the kids away at school and the house a little more under control, I felt like I was ready to bring it home from the bookstore. It was an emotional read. I most enjoyed (translation: wept the most during) the middle chapters about the infinite suffering, love, time, depth, and coverage of the atonement of the Savior. The book is also strong in the doctrine of The Fall and the necessity of the atonement.

I was not presented with a lot of new doctrine, but the book helped me to experience a depth of feeling about doctrines that I had mostly experienced superficially. The author’s strong organization also helped me feel the magnitude of the topic.To complement the words of scripture and apostles, the author quotes from Milton, Shakespeare, C.S. Lewis, and others to find mankind’s most poignant words for the Savior’s gift.

During the days that I read this, I would go to choir and I couldn’t sing about Calvary because of my feelings. I found myself sneaking minutes to read here and there throughout the day. That was best, because this book needed to be read in measured doses. The margins are full of notes. It was a good inaugural Christmastime read.

Temple Square Christmas Lights

My mom took the boys on a quick, impromptu tour of Temple Square since she had an appointment downtown.

True, the lights are beautiful, but as my Mom explains, the real beauty is the temple.

 

Mark really liked the scale model of the interior of the temple that they found in the visitor’s center.

The big photos were taken by Timothy. He was proud of this photo of the Christus statue.

Thanks, Grandma, for taking them to Temple Square! It was Timothy and Mark’s first trip to see the lights and probably the first trip that Daniel can remember since he was only two years old when he first saw them.

Schooling our Perception

I studied a conference talk by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland last week in preparation for a lesson I was to teach. It was about the parable of the laborers in Matthew chapter 20.

There are many thoughts that emerged from this study, but the biggest for me was that we can school the way we perceive events.

We can make a choice about how we feel about things… perceived injustices especially. We can make a choice to let go of grudges. We can choose to see the good in a person or group of people. We are not naive to wrongs, but wise as serpents, harmless as lambs, we can more forward with courage.

My friend said that the philosophy of trusting and acting on everything that comes into your head is dangerous. We need to school our thoughts so we can act in the best ways. We can’t always trust our feelings to lead us to the best path. We can’t always trust our first perception of things. We certainly can’t trust that desire to hang on to past hurts.

Parables invite us to be participants. I tend to put myself in parables among the sheep and the 99, not as a goat or the lost ONE. The truth is, we all spend time as the prodigal now and then and it would be healthy to read the parables from the sinner’s perspective. It’s when we do this that we can find our Heavenly Father’s love and grace. We can school ourselves to find new perspectives.

I get the impression that many women tend to place themselves in the prodigal’s place too often, feeling that they can never measure up.

There is danger in both kinds of one-sided thinking. When we forget to school our thinking, we either become too concerned about justice in one case or about mercy in the other, forgetting that we need both.

“Be kind, and be grateful that God is kind. It is a happy way to live.” -Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

Elder Holland’s talk can be heard here.

Conference Memories

What a memorable General Conference. I sobbed when I heard the announcement for a Tucson temple. We are thrilled about lowering the age for missionaries to serve. I loved Elder Holland’s talk.

Richard and Daniel were able to attend the General Priesthood meeting. I’m having technical difficulties with the annual father-son photo, but when I get that worked out, I’ll post Daniel and Richard standing beside one another in front of our house, Daniel’s limbs creeping out of bounds on the hems of last year’s suit.

Richard and Daniel rode Trax to downtown Salt Lake to avoid having to park.

We watched conference at home and one session at my parents’ mountain retreat. The little boys played with blocks and Lego Mindstorms as they listened to the speakers.

I just noticed Timothy’s awesome foundation.

 

Firsts

On Sunday I accompanied the choir on my violin for the first time in my new congregation. The first time is always nerve wracking, but with Daniel’s encouragement and prayers and holding a text message from Richard, I braved another “first” and it went just fine.

The kids are settling in very well to school. It’s taken a month, but we’re falling into a routine. The transition was a lot smoother than I expected. Richard gave each child a priesthood blessing the night before school began. I know that this has helped. I look back without regret at the years we spent together and pat myself on the back when I see their reading, math, and science scores. It helps soothe the ignominy of facing the skeptical public school administration a few weeks ago.

We went to our first church party. Paige and Daniel immediately found their friends and we didn’t see them all evening. Let me repeat: Paige and Daniel IMMEDIATELY FOUND THEIR FRIENDS. Tim and Mark played ball with a handful of primary children and came home with pockets stuffed with candy from the pinata. On the drive home, I asked the kids if they had a good time. They all said yes. Let me repeat: THEY ALL SAID YES! Daniel said, “Mom, this must be the right place for us.”

Absolutely.

I’m emotionally spent, despite most of these things being good developments in our lives. My sister-in-law Becky Sanchez unexpectedly stopped by our house late one night this week. She was in town for a funeral and had an just an hour to see us. It was a good visit. Her conversation was just what my tired nerves needed. I’m thankful to have her as a sister in law and that I got to hold her sweet new baby.

I am a tired but very blessed woman.