Today is the private burial service for my friend and neighbor Judy. Grief turns on the whole spectrum of emotions: anger, sadness, disappointment, and even happiness. I feel anger because I couldn’t say goodbye and because of some other things. The sadness comes when I look out my kitchen window and see her house. It’s been months since I could check on her from my window to see that she was eating a little dinner, and I still miss that. Her house is full of strange new shadows and happenings. I am disappointed not to be playing violin at her funeral, Brightly Beams Our Father’s Mercy, like she asked, or preparing a salad for a family luncheon. The happiness is in knowing she is at peace, and I know she is back to work, smiling, teaching, and living.